Sunday, 25 May 2014

Presumed-Watched Anime

Contrary to what one might think, this won't be reminiscent of a twelve-year-olds' 50-minute long YouTube video labelled "10 BEST ANIMES* OF ALL TIME". No, my dear friends, far from it. This is a comprehensive list constructed to include what might be called "classics", regardless of how recently they aired. It is truly a list of must-watch anime, a list of titles that one must have under his belt before he can truly say "I watch anime" (though I don't really know why you would).

I think I make it pretty clear in the explanations, but I should probably point out here that I'm not explicitly stating nor am I implying that any of these anime are good.  Don't get me wrong, many of them are great, and a lot of my personal favourites are included in here, but the rest of them are essentially garbage that most just get over and done with so that they're on the same page as everyone else. I guess it's up to you to decide which ones those are.

Before you ask, or even look for recommendations, even from the /a/ wiki, you need to have ticked off every one of these series. If you don't like how one of these series sounds, then man the fuck up and watch it anyway. Also I think it would be a good idea to mention that this list is in no particular order, other than loosely alphabetical.

*You're asking to be lynched if you ever say "animes" as if it's correct

The List

5 Centimetres per Second
The first one on the list is 5cms^-1, which is in fact a movie and not a series, and probably the only movie that belongs on this list. In fact, it's a compilation of three short stories, told about the same character but at different points in time. Known for its scenery porn having earned it the nickname "5 wallpapers per second", it is in fact a well-written romance story with deep symbolism and whatnot.

Angel Beats
As bad and full of plot holes as this series is, ever since its timely release in 2010, it's taken the title of "babby's first baww anime" away from Clannad. A good entry level series with great visuals and audio, but the more pedantic may not be all that pleased with the botched ending and contradictory story.

Ano Hi Mita Hana no Name wo Bokutachi wa Mada Shiranai
Yes, that's the real name. Despite it's fairly recent airing in 2011, it's well-known for being an effective tearjerker. While this anime doesn't boast magic-ridden fight scenes and mile-thick plot armour, the story it tells is something most can appreciate.

Madoka aside, the Monogatari series is probably SHAFT's most well-known franchise. Boasting intellectual and witty dialogue, people who can appreciate intelligent conversation tend to enjoy this anime. If it's not your cup of tea, the rest of the franchise is optional, but having seen Bakemonogatari is a must.

Next on the list is the former reigning champion of the aforementioned "babby's first baww anime". You'll often here preachy faggots tell you this anime made them cry manly tears and the like, but the series is genuinely good. Make sure you watch the After Story - the second season. Contrary to what you'd expect, it's hardly a generic harem and the visual novel was better.

Code Geass
Aside from the Gundam franchise, Code Geass is the mecha show. And the best part is, the story doesn't (solely) revolve around pretentious twats flying around in unrealistic robots. We have politics, ethics and Pizza Hut product placement as well! A classic if there ever was one, you'll never meet an anime fan that doesn't know Code Geass.

Darker than Black
While the second season was extremely poorly received, and rightly so, Darker than Black is an anime that boasts deep and edgy, and yet the slow pacing is enough to drive away all the little kids. With several powerlevel-hiding elements in it, you would feel extremely left out if you didn't know what BK201 is, or can't recognise Hei's mask.

Death Note
Next in line for deep and edgy series is Death Note. It was a great ride while it was airing, but everyone seems to hate it now. Probably because anyone who wants to start up a Death Note thread is 10 years too late, but regardless, this is also something you need to have seen. Just be ready to bear with the all the asspulls and don't take it too seriously, and you'll have a blast.

This is probably one of the anime that arguably may or may not belong on this list, but I've decided to include it since, well, it was pretty damn good. Similar to Darker than Black, the slow pacing tends to make people drop the show before they get really into it, but the complexity of all the character relationships is something to be appreciated. There's also a lot of BL. Check out my review after you watch it.

Durarara wallpaper

Eden of the East
Eden of the East is definitely worth a mention. It has references to western literature (noblesse oblige, paradise lost, anyone?) as well as one of the best AI characters ever created, along with a convoluted yet compelling story and a relatively unique art style for its time - worth the watch, I would say.

Fate/Stay Night
This piece of shit is the reason the internet has been flooded with "people die if they are killed" and several other cringe-inducing memes. The anime was a horrible, botched adaptation of a halfway decent visual novel, and Fate/Zero was only good for ufotable's climax-inducing animation, but everyone's watched it anyway, so you might as well. Even now there's still discussion about it, and this shitty meme isn't dead just yet.

Fullmetal Alchemist
The hype has died down over the past couple of years, and it's been all but forgotten now that the franchise is pretty much dead, but it's still the first good anime about alchemy, as far as I know. The original series was meant to be an adaptation of the manga but it kind of went off on a tangent at some point, so BONES did a remake and called it Brotherhood, and apparently that's the one to watch. I'm guilty of not watching Brotherhood 'til the end, but I'll probably see to it at some point.

Guilty Crown
Oh god, Guilty Crown. It aired fairly recently in 2011, but it will probably go down in history as one of the most laughable attempts at anime. Guilty Crown Thursdays were something to look forward to, because it was the most hilarious trainwreck that's been seen in a while. The visuals and music were amazing, though, and you probably wouldn't get all the "shoe..." references until you watch this shit.

Kaiji is an intelligent anime, with high-stakes gambling, psychological warfare and battles of wits. Before you complain, the manga artist intentionally drew the characters that way. It's one of the best thriller/suspense anime I've seen, while still having comedy elements, and the overpoweredness of the main character is extremely well-hidden. It also has real manly tears, caterpillar ears and huge noses.

Another masterpiece by Nisio, with a childish/vectory art style to boot. It's an extremely immersive watch, and will probably hit you right in the feels. It was so good, in fact, that it reaired on TV pretty recently with a new OP and ED by supercell and Pico, both of which are pretty damn good. What I'm getting at is, this anime is fucking good, so watch it if you haven't, you faggot.

>inb4 moeshit etc etc. K-On is probably one of the most polarising series, because all of its hardcore fans are all mouth-breathing neckbeards. Still, it's probably the anime that truly got "moe" started, and definitely belongs on this list. Simply put, it's cute girls doing cute things, but there's also some pretty decent music that comes with it.

K-On! wallpaper

Lucky Star
All but forgotten, Lucky Star was the original moe anime, by Kyoani, at least. While the art style makes it look like it was aimed towards children more than anything, it's a cutesy comedy that requires a bit of background knowledge to appreciate. It references several shows and makes jokes about Japanese culture, and even though I enjoyed it as I first got into anime, most don't. Just stick around until episode 5 or so, because the original director was retarded and was fired after a couple of episodes.

Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica
If you hang around here often, you probably would've guessed this already. Puella Magi Madoka Magica is SHAFT's biggest cash cow, and it's being milked to death before they finish Kizumonogatari. Like K-On, it's got a pretty split audience, but it's not people that like it and people that don't, just people arguing over waifus and whether or not a certain person did anything wrong. I've got a review for this show too, but it's pretty spoiler heavy, so look at it after you watch.

The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
Kyoani's biggest trollfest was a lot more popular than most let on. In and of itself, it was nothing amazing, but Haruhi is probably the anime of anime. Everyone should be aware of the most popular bitch and gang, and the nameless main character. If you've heard "endless eight", "hare hare yukai", "aliens, espers & time travellers", "SOS brigade", "nyoro~n" or "kyon-kun, denwa" and have no idea what was going on, stop reading this instant and watch Haruhi.

Neon Genesis Evangelion
The original "what the fuck just happened" anime. Don't let the age (it aired in 1995) deter you - the fact that its that old and yet a fourth movie is in the making (as of writing this post) speaks for itself. It's full of biblical references and symbolism, and Anno was probably on crack when he wrote the script so I don't think he knows what's going on either. Just don't watch it all at once if you like your brain the way it is.